A portion of my WWII script: Night of Nights, Day of Days

SgtPadrino · Post by **SgtPadrino** » Fri May 21, 2004 3:23 am

Title card:
Ã¢â‚¬Å“Soldiers, Sailors, and Airmen of the Allied Expeditionary Force: You are about to embark on the Great Crusade, toward which we have striven these many months. The eyes of the world are upon you.

Good luck! And let us all beseech the blessing of the Almighty God upon this great and noble undertaking.Ã¢â‚¬

Epsilon · Post by **Epsilon** » Fri May 21, 2004 3:39 am

I don't believe they were that vulgar in WW2. Interesting story anyhow. I shall read it a little more thoroughly later.

SgtPadrino · Post by **SgtPadrino** » Sat May 22, 2004 7:50 pm

Alright, if you read the frickin thing, how hard is it to put up a review? Damn, people!

film fanatic · Post by **film fanatic** » Sat May 22, 2004 7:52 pm

Hey, I liked the Medal of Honor quotes

Well done

Epsilon · Post by **Epsilon** » Sat May 22, 2004 10:35 pm

Okay, I have read it through. Very ineresting. I think it is way too highly vulgar, almost like a foxwood script. It is building up to something, though I expect the rest of the script will have the climax and resolution. It sounds very much like Band of Brothers, Part 2 right now.

The cut between the opening sequence and the titles seems awfully harsh. Also the whole thing sounds a bit too, um... typical. Maybe have something original occur? A different theme they all follow, maybe? And I see you stuck FUBAR in there as well.

That's all I have to say at the moment.

SgtPadrino · Post by **SgtPadrino** » Sun May 23, 2004 12:47 am

Well, this story hasn't been done too many times, in Hollywood or here (to the best of my knowledge at least). Or maybe the whole soldier's honor thing of risking your life to rescue another is unoriginal? But hey, that's been a real aspect of war since the Civil War. Anyway, fubar is a common saying in the military, nothing more. Saving Private Ryan just happened to use it a lot

SgtPadrino · Post by **SgtPadrino** » Wed May 26, 2004 2:11 am

Come on, people. Any other opinions? Any at all?

foxwood · Post by **foxwood** » Wed May 26, 2004 3:12 am

well I read the openning and skimmed across the rest, what can I say, lazy bumb, but it sounds fine if not super orignal, but then war movies are all in the exicution not the consept. when you get a finished script up I'll read the entire thing. And I didn't find it to Vulger, troopers are troopers, hell if I had writen it it would have been worse.

tallman_house_pictures · Wed May 26, 2004 3:55 am

Cool looking script.........read part of it, rest tommorow.
Are those Characters from Call of Duty?

SgtPadrino · Post by **SgtPadrino** » Wed May 26, 2004 4:16 am

For the most part no, just took the last names of two of the characters and went from there.

Epsilon · Post by **Epsilon** » Wed May 26, 2004 5:54 am

foxwood wrote:And I didn't find it to Vulger, troopers are troopers, hell if I had writen it it would have been worse.

Ah hah! Coming from foxwood, what defines vulgar!?

I think thre is too much cursing.

foxwood · Post by **foxwood** » Wed May 26, 2004 3:18 pm

Epsilon wrote:
foxwood wrote:And I didn't find it to Vulger, troopers are troopers, hell if I had writen it it would have been worse.
Ah hah! Coming from foxwood, what defines vulgar!?

I think thre is too much cursing.

My defenition of vulguer is rather low, my tolerance and acseptance and use of vulgarity is high.

SgtPadrino · Post by **SgtPadrino** » Thu May 27, 2004 9:58 pm

I think there's a right amount of cursing, considering the predicament they're in. But there'll probably be less swearing in the final version anyway.

Gyro · Post by **Gyro** » Thu May 27, 2004 11:24 pm

c-47 as aposed to dc-3? all though they were pretty much the same, just checking.

Epsilon · Post by **Epsilon** » Tue Jun 01, 2004 6:39 am

^ac-47.

I found that I can make an interior of a drop plane simply by lining up collapsable tables along the walls in the hallway. A room enterance would be the door!

SgtPadrino · Post by **SgtPadrino** » Mon Jul 12, 2004 6:19 pm

Edit: Revised the original script and added another scene. Enjoy.

foxwood · Post by **foxwood** » Mon Jul 12, 2004 6:46 pm

The diologe feels strange, that didn't seem to be the best place to explane the nickname in. Its a good bit of charator, but could probably be used better someplace ealse. Other then that it is a bit detail light in the action, and the plan seems very non-diologeish, my question have you tryed reading what you are writing outloud, that will make your diologe sound better.

Story wise, seems like a typical war flick.

lukeprausnitz · Post by **lukeprausnitz** » Mon Jul 12, 2004 7:09 pm

Epsilon wrote:I don't believe they were that vulgar in WW2.

how many soldiers do you know? soldiers tend to be quite vulgar and swear a lot. also, they were in the middle of a war.

Rampage4 · Post by **Rampage4** » Mon Jul 12, 2004 7:13 pm

I thought that was pretty neat, and there was some good character development touches and sharp dialogue in there. I think that you need some gimmick or original idea to make it into something special. I personally don't think that cussing is an issue. When I write a script, there is a swear word at least twice on every page.

SgtPadrino · Post by **SgtPadrino** » Mon Jul 12, 2004 7:23 pm

Well, I'm going to be playing the part of Carlson, and I do speak the parts aloud so I know where to pause and place emphasis and whatnot. Besides, a sergeant probably wouldn't be too casual about outlining a plan of attack.

foxwood · Post by **foxwood** » Tue Jul 13, 2004 12:00 am

Well then put down some commas, it wasn't the plan outline that was any problem it was the nickname thing, that just seemed the wrong time to go into it.